Fiercely Independent Pam

Blog

  • I am Finally Getting Somewhere, But Is It Fast Enough and Brings Me More Confidence?

    So, I am slowly making progress in gaining strength , but my confidence is very much laking and I am terrified that I am going to fall. I am able to stand with the help of either PT or OT being right by my side and even then I hesitate to be able to stand or take a few steps. So, I have decided to enter and intensive inpatient rehab program. If I am accepted, I will start on Saturday after my IVIG infusion on Friday.

    I think this might be the best thing for me as, I need to gain some confidence to be able to stand and walk short distances. I am hoping it is for 5-10 days and then I can return to be Fiercely Independent Pam World.

    The jury is still out to see if I will be accepted. my track record isn’t the best in being accepted, but I am working with some incredible people that seem to want to make it happen.

    In the meantime, I am working hard to build my own confidence and hopefully some standing and even a little walking on my own. I’d love to be able to get scale reading, but that is big deal and not the easiest to get when you are barely standing on your own.

    I have a sneaky idea that I am going to be on the cusp of being able to things on my own when it comes time to enter rehab. I guess I’m just going to have to trust my gut about what is the best decision for my progress. I also have to remember that I have important doctor visits, especially down at MUSC. No matter what, I need to be able to stand and move in order to get in a car and use either my walker or Zeen to be able to get around.

  • Rough Times Ahead! Working Oh So Hard At Building Strength!

    So, things aren’t going as smooth as I thought they would. I am definitely on the struggle bus for strength and ability to transfer. I’ve gotten stuck in more places than I chose to share but I cannot say enough good things about the fire department (lift/assist). They have been wonderful in getting me out of unique situations. It is a combination of not enough strength and complete fear of falling and being on the ground. I started with PT yesterday and just need to keep building strength so that I can stand on my own. Once I can stand, all will be fine. In the meantime I am using the transfer board as needed.

    On top of all of this, I am dealing with a crazy amount of thrush in my mouth mostly from the steroids. It’s quite painful and limits how much I want to eat or drink. I have medication, so I am hoping that makes a big difference today.

    I also am almost caught up with my Bible in a Year Podcast- I fell behind while I was in the hospital and it’s a lot to catch back up, but this is happening too! I got so much out of the Rosary in a Year, that I thought I would try the Bible in a Year!

    Then, once I have gained enough strength to stand, I am looking forward to trying out my new Zeen. It has the ability to move me from sit to stand, so that is a good thing and I can even get some exercises done on it.

    I also have a lot of organizing to do and unpacking of some shopping adventures- looking forward to seeing what I was able to get. The biggest adventure for today is to not get stuck anywhere(especially on the toilet) and not end up falling on the floor.

    I GOT THIS!!!

  • Home and Almost Reset! Just Missing a Whole Lot of Strength- But My Heart Is Ready!

    Well I made it home! All safe in my little corner of the world. I even had a wonderful lunch catching up with an old friend, who will hopefully help me find some tutoring gigs too! Even managed to open some packages and get a little organized. Needed the help of lift and assist from the fire department, and they were more than wonderful!

    I was NOT prepared for how weak I actually am now that In am home. I really can’t stand on my own, and terrified of falling. So, it’s back to my “roots” using an old fashioned sliding board to transfer out of bed and into my wheelchair or arm chair. I need to get stronger, but for now, this is going to have to be how it is to be done.

    A huge thanks to my caregiver who with our thoughts together managed a small little shower last night and it made all the difference. I am so bruised up that I hope I heal well.

    Thank goodness I can self catherize anywhere because I really can’t get on or off the toilet right now- TMI sorry-

    It doesn’t help that we are supposed to get a winter storm of sorts, but I guess being stuck in my apartment isn’t the end of the world at all since I am not in the hospital anymore. Unfortunately, I had to cancel facials with my niece because I am not up to it, but I will make it up to her for sure and it will feel even better knowing I did it on my own.

    Today, begins appointments- nurse for resumption of care and hopefully the ENT as well. I ordered an Instacart order and looking forward to some new things to drink. Hopefully, I will also be able to get some organization done too. I also have a newsletter floating out there somewhere too!

    So, I move forward, carefully and intently. Looking forward to working with PT/OT again and being able to transfer without the board and being more independent again. I too will rise again, I have been down before and know what needs to happen. My biggest issue right now is to stay off the floor and in my bed or chair. I have enough new “toys” to play with to keep me busy and not exploring and going places I shouldn’t be going down.

    Other than being just so happy to be home, I am sore- especially where they put my shiny new picc line- its more tunneled than I expected, but it got me home and its able to be used for the necessary IV antibiotics that I need each day to get rid of these major infections- all at the tune of over $3000. No one ever said that chronic illness is cheap!